How to be a successful woman

 Every young woman wishes to be successful in her personal and professional lives. But the path to success can be narrow and twisted; it requires that you be proactive in several aspects of your life. Talk about being Proactive, you set your goals and work diligently towards them. In the African setting, most parents are there to guide their children towards setting goals. From as early as Nursery School; children are taught to role play towards their future goals of being doctors or Lawyers, and somehow they grow up with the life’s goal of becoming a doctor or a lawyer. African parents do very well at guiding their children towards a successful professional life but often forget or ignore the impact of guidance through personal life especially with matters of sexual reproductive health. The mothers teach their adolescent daughters to stay away from boys completely in order to avoid getting pregnant. But the daughters soon realize that getting close to boys as described, doesn’t on its own result to pregnancy, so that myth is debunked soon and young girls begin to feel free amongst their male peers.

This reminds me of the case of a young medical student from my University Days. Wunmi, was a tall beautiful dark- skinned girl. She was the daughter of a well-known pastor. Wunmi hardly speaks to regular boys who flock around the hostel in search of girlfriends but she spends most of her weekends in campus fellowship or so everyone thought.

 Just before the end of 2nd year, Wunmi started spending weekends in the hostel and looked sick most of the time. Everyone advised her to go home to get treated and cared for but she insisted that she was fine. It didn’t take too long when she was seen vomiting helplessly in the mornings. What could be wrong? Wunmi was known to be a decent daughter of a pastor unlike the known supposedly wayward girls who travelled out of town every other weekend to visit boyfriends and sugar daddies.

In no time, the news broke out in the hostel, Wunmi was pregnant for Brother Mike and she wouldn’t go home or call her parents for fear of their reaction. She stopped attending classes and eventually dropped out of medical school. News had it that her parents heard of her pregnancy and had disowned her for bringing so much embarrassment and shame to them. All their dreams and hope of raising a brilliant doctor was shattered.

African parents need to be equally proactive in properly educating their children in matters of sexual reproductive health, as they are in preparing them to be doctors or lawyers. Whilst preaching abstinence, it is essential that young people are informed on the contraceptive options available. 

As a young married or unmarried woman, in setting goals and preparing proactively towards your goals, ensure to be equally proactive about your Sexual Reproductive Health. If you are married but just starting with your career, you may need to wait for one year or two before getting pregnant to avoid any hurdles to your career growth. Are you unmarried but sexually active? There is a wide range of pregnancy prevention methods which you can adopt at the nearest healthcare facility